With my NHL 2k9 out of the way (it's now posted here), I've got some other games that require my attention: The Witcher (Enhanced Edition) and Mount & Blade. Possibly Hinterlands as well if Bill ever confirms that for me. (Hint, hint, Mr. A.)
But I'll tell you, after reading the following from Rock, Paper Shotgun., at some point I have to play King's Bounty:
Various characters in the game kept recommending I get married, but beyond the king’s child daughter rather unnervingly flirting with me and some polite chit-chat with an old lady who sold plant-beasts, I couldn’t find any women in the game, let alone one to make my bride. Then I met Hake, the robber-baron. He was in a bit of bind because his wife had turned into a zombie. As is so often the way in anything RPGy, he tasked me with solving his problem. So I duly did some trekking about for him, and eventually discovered the magic phrase that would de-zombify the poor lass. A hero is me.
At which point he revealed that, actually, having an undead wife was quite handy - she could test his food for poisons and… well, his reasons weren’t entirely convincing, if I’m honest. And that’s when a surprising dialogue option appeared. There was always at least one vaguely psychotic response I could choose in any given conversation, but requesting if I could buy a man’s wife off him was a whole new layer of madness. I couldn’t not go for it, but fully expected violent reprisal for my cheek.
Except he agreed. For just 5000g (not a lot in KB’s money-rich landscape), I had myself a wife. Not just any old wife - a zombie wife. I was married to a zombie. Ew. A zombie who I could talk to about having kids. Ewww.
I didn’t really want to go there, but fortunately it turned out I could use that magic de-zombie phrase whenever I wanted, so I did the gentlemanly thing: restored her humanity, pledged undying love, and fathered a child. Then, with my heir sorted, I turned her back into a zombie again. Then I divorced her for someone else. The combat bonuses were better, you understand.
First of all, that's great writing. Second of all, that's hysterical gameplay.
This game instantly goes to the top of my New Year's list of games to play when the doldrums of winter whip their way into town on a chill wind. (That, by the way, is an example of really bad writing. It's kinda my thing.)