Tuesday, November 4, 2008

"Where are my goddamn wins, you bum?"

There are two groups of people in this world: Fans of The Big Lebowski and morons. If you're in the latter, relax. I'm kidding (mostly). For the rest of us Brian at M Go Blog has put together a must-read re-imagining of the sequence where our hero, The Dude, is forced into the Big Lebowski's car.

Here's a snippet:



I—the royal we, you know, the fan we—he'll get the wins, exactly as specified—look, I've got certain information. Certain things have come to light, and, uh, has it ever occurred to you that instead of running around blaming Rich that this whole thing might just be, not, you know just such a simple, but uh—you know?


What in God's holy name are you blathering about?


I'll tell you what I'm blathering about! I got information—new shit has come to light—and, shit, man… we started a walk-on at quarterback!


   … …


Well, sure, look at it! Ridiculously young offense, gives turnovers all over town, including to known Domers—and that's cool, that's cool—but I'm saying, he needs time, and of course they're going to say he doesn't need any because they gotta feed the monkey—I mean, hasn't that ever occurred to you? Sir?

Hey, we just gave up 48 points to Purdue and lost on a fucking hook and ladder. (And thank goodness BrakkeCon saved me from watching that unfold.)At this point, what is left to do but try to get some laughs out of this disastrous season?

1 comment:

DarkNater said...

I hate the fucking eagles!