Monday, July 13, 2009

Skullz Start Season on Promising Note

The Mt. Bloodhorn Skullz won a hard fought opener in the Blood Bowl Invitational against the Chaos Quebec Rampagers 2-0 in a match that was much closer than the score may indicate.

It is the first game in what is a grueling back to back Chaos stretch for the boys in green who get Corporate Chaos in Week 2. Said Captain Dimzad the Grinning afterward, "Weez gonna be tired of dem Chaos boyz. Dem boyz wit' da stabby 'ornz make me 'ead urt."

Dimzad would know, as the captain spent most of the game flat on his back. Late in the 2nd half when he managed to scoop up the ball he was immediately blitzed by a sharp horned Beastman and pummeled back into the astrogranite.

Thankfully for the rest of the Skullz, others picked up the slack.

Mt. Bloodhorn received the opening kickoff and after trading blows at the line of scrimmage with Chaos Warriors a small hole opened on the left side of the Rampagers' line. The Rookie thrower who is only known as "Da Chukka" fielded the kick and made his way near midfield when he did something mildly unexpected for an Orc team.

He passed.

"Da Boss payz me to chuk dat spikey ball. Dats wut I did," Chukka said afterward.

On the receiving end was Blitzer Gag Blistervex, who raced through the opening, shoving an unsuspecting Beastman into the stands along the way. As the Orc hooligans started to cheer and throw beer bottles at the Rampager fans, Rookie Chaos Warrior Belmoth Dha Ghur
came out of nowhere and put Gag on his back, sending the ball rolling near the goal line. It would only be a temporary setback as Gag would later scramble to his feet and flatten Dha Ghur (with a little help from lineman Gog Blacksoul) and race into the end zone to give the Skullz a 1-0 advantage -- an advantage that they would take into halftime.

The Skullz were down a player going into the 2nd half as huge Black Orc Blocker Urgot Thruzz was violently and maliciously fouled late in the first half by three laughing Beastmen. The referee was unwilling to send any of the guilty Beastmen off, seeing as that Chaos teams are notorious for referee slayings post match. In addition to Thruzz, lineman Gorka Morka was knocked out cold and wanted no part of the 2nd half kick.

Even down a player, the Skullz defense held firm, not allowing the Rampagers to cross midfield, although with time running out a Beastman tried an across the pitch pass to a wide open Beastie which could have proven the Skullz downfall -- the pass was right on the money...but was dropped and with it the chance to tie it up.

Blitzer D.O.A. Sorepain scored as the clock expired to notch a meaningless touchdown as time ran out.

Despite the victory perhaps the best news is that the Skullz will have every player for its next match against yet another Chaos squad. The Rampagers suffered only 1 casualty, as a Beastman will miss the next game as Bliztervex shattered his jaw early in the 1st.

Finally, proving that there is always time for levity in Blood Bowl game MVP Blitzer 'Feerce Eye' Bludskul, commenting on his earning the coveted honor despite not garnering one official statistic said after the game, "I wuz wut?"